I used to disagree with Mirek on the issue of reading fairy tales to our girls. When I was a little girl I used to love fairy tales. I didn't read a whole lot of them, and my favourite one was "Cinderella" (not the Disney kind, of course). I'd daydream of becoming a Cinderella and trying on a glass shoe and dancing with a prince. My fantacies were innocent. I didn't want to be a mean step mother or dumb and jealous step sisters. I wanted to be what's the best in the fairy tale, what had the most magic and joy, I wanted to be a part of a "happy end".
Mirek was telling me about his dislike of fairy tales when he was growing up. That he'd rather read adventure books, or books about Native American tribes and their culture and traditions. So, I took the "fairy tales issue" as a boy/girl difference in interests.
Ivana loves fairy tales. She loves to play dressing up and chose to be a Cinderella for last Halloween. We went to see "Cinderella" show in the theater, and it was all innocent until... As a gift we got a "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs" videotape from our friends. Now what do I get to blame for teaching my daughter to play "A poison apple! Sleeping death!" game? Why did she get attracted by the evil side of the story, rather than kind? Why did she prefer to imitate the cackle of the queen's changed voice and pretend that her hands are all wrinkled and warty instead of singing happy Snow White's songs? Why does she think it's funny to let her little sister bite into a red apple from our frig and make her pretend she's falling on the floor? "Ha, ha! Her breath will still-her blood congeal. Now I'll be the fairest in the land!"
We've been telling her all these years that the characters in the fairy tales are not real, that they are all a product of somebody's imagination only. Now, is that game just Ivana' s way of excercising her own imagination, and what are the long term effects of her watching these kind of stories? Are they really beneficial for her developing personality and what are they really teaching the little kid about the world?
I put the videotape away a couple of weeks ago, and there was no more "poison apple, sleeping death" game. Instead, I decided to concentrate on really educational tapes for them to watch. A friend from our homeschooling group let us borrow a few tapes about artists. We've watched "Leonardo Da Vinci', "Monet", "Degas and the Dancer"already, and there are so many other wonderful stories to watch from these series.
Now Ivana is not running into the other room and waiting for the episode when the Huntsman is about to kill Snow White to pass, but happily dancing with a little ballerina Marie from the movie "Degas and the Dancer". A red delicious apple is not being served to Leona as a "poison apple". And I think "that" tape will not be having a come back!
3 comments:
One thing I learned at a psychology symposium years ago is that all people are born with both good and evil tendencies. Fairy tales are often seen as a way for a child to play act or "rid" themselves of these negative tendencies in a safe way, rather than lashing out and hurting others. It is similar to kids playing knights with plastic swords...one would rarely think their children actually have an inate need to cut others open! It is healthful to role play. but you know your children best. If it gets out of hand, take a break from it as you have. Try the video "Linnea in Monet's Garden"-it is precious!
Thank you for your comment and advice, Angela!
We actually have a book "Linnea in Monet's Garden". I bought it in the library when they were getting rid of "not popular books" for 5 cents! I wasn't aware of the video, so I'll try to find it.
I used to play witch with my sister too - catch her, sit her on the toy stove, and then eat her! By the way, Claire broke my palmpilot so I can't call you - are you free friday?
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